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We both spend a tremendous amount of time on the 'net and cell phone, all of it either family business, budgeting, or leisure. But we're not tethered, more of just something to occupy free time. If we had money to do anything we want to go camping fishing, road trips, fix up the old Jeeps, go out to eat or to the, remodeling projects, we do it without hesitation or thought of our electronic gadgets. But because money is tight (on a serious mission to pay down debt), we don't have cash to do anything. So we stay home, save our money, and surf. We have cell phones, but we have a no-texting, limited minutes package and have all texts blocked from others. (If they want to talk to us, they can damn well dial the number and talk, not text.) I suppose you could say we unplug for at least an hour a day, usually after dinner, when we go out to the front porch to converse about the day, the budget, the real estate search, or whatever. The TV and computers are too distracting to do this indoors so yeah, we "unplug" for those front porch meetings every single day, sometimes several times. It helps that he has his laptop and me my PC, both situated in the living room, side by side in relative comfort. He sees what I'm doing, and visa versa. We discuss and interrupt each other constantly, share links and laughs and debates; meanwhile watching TV as well. So it's really more of a couples event for us anyway. So I get it often people's electronics get in the way of their relationships, more of a solitary activity which excludes the partner. But for us, nothing is solitary about it.
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Your wife plays games that would be deal breakers in my world. Taking on Sherburne 50g in debt would be one thing, if she had some dreaded medical problem and the money was life saving. Spent like an irresponsible teenager and kept secret from you, the person she expects to clean up her mess? Oh, hell no! Then withholding sex? This is not the time to talk to mother. This is the time to talk with a lawyer or two. One for the divorce. The other, to investigate bankruptcy. If during the process wifezilla puts on her big girl pants and starts acting like a partner instead of an asshole, you might consider marriage counseling. But let HER make the arrangements. Let HER come to you. And let HER open up the cookie jar, and apologize for closing it in the first place. (Poppy Brite in the 80's) left out that the F/F couples had less sex but more orgasms than the M/F couples. Women take longer. Two women take even longer. So no quickies before work Also women won't have sex when they are pissed and men. I know two guys. They are married and have been together forever. One guy is drowning in high interest student debt. His husband owns their house with a teeny mortgage and could refinance it so my friend ( not the husband, he's not asking for a handout and he's not asking to have his name on the house ) could pay down his debt. He's responsible,has always worked hard and has less money than his husband. They still have sex. In any household with women. Two women. A woman and a. A polyamorous triad with one woman. Mormons with multiple brides. THERE WOULD BE NO DANM SEX until was paid off. Not times a week. Not two times a week. No damn times a week.
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